princessences | [IC] Inbox @ deerington

"I guess" doesn't fill me with much confidence.

[ She trusts Shiro on many levels, but taking care of himself is where he could use some help, she's realized. It was much easier to oversee when missions and general protocol were to be followed by all members of the team, but here in Deerington, day to day life is very different. ]

Toxic?

[ Hold on a second. ]

Do they think that you might have been infected? Or are they testing some other substance and seeing what affect it has on Human blood?

[ Please say it's the latter or else they may be going right back to that hospital.

But...she stands a little straighter at that. ]

..."Wake them up"? Is that...referring to us?

Hey, it's probably perfectly fine. Just been a while since... anyone needed any out of me. [Voluntarily. And human. But that's neither here nor there.] All I remember is you're supposed to up your sugar intake after.

[At least that's how it was when you donated blood.]

They... [He blows out a breath. There's no reason to lie to her. But on the other hand, worrying her isn't high on his list of priorities, either.] So far, there isn't anything to worry about. There's nothing coming up on their own tests.

It could be nothing, and we're all just being paranoid.

[And then on to the easier topic.]

We don't know for sure. We couldn't find anything that said for sure.

i see...

[ Up your sugar intake? Well, she can handle that. Which is why she goes into the cupboard and takes out the bag of sugar. Yes, this is happening. Don't mind as she dumps more than necessary into his orange juice cup. ]

That still doesn't answer my question, though, Shiro. Are they testing you?

[ It will worry her more not to have an answer. ]

Hm...I imagine there is still more of the hospital to see. Is that true?

I --

[Oh. That. Sure is sugar going into the juice. For a second, he just sort of stares at it. And then sighs. Might as well.]

[Yeah, he's going to actually drink the Sugar Orange Juice. This is fine.]

Yes. I asked them to. [Because he was there. He'd been fighting in the thick of it as much as anyone else.]

That, I don't know. The third floor was the only abnormal one we knew of.

[ Yes, yes it is. And it is probably delicious. (No it isn't.) She's just trying to help

She puts the sugar on the counter, just wanting to keep it available.You know, in case he needs more.

But...she isn't too happy to hear that. No, not at all. That he could be sick? ]

Shiro...how long have you known that you could have contracted something?

[ Allura isn't angry. Not right now. ]

So there could be other places that warrant exploring. But this is clearly takes precedent.

[It... actually tastes like kid drinks. So, not great, but not heinous, either. He's absolutely going to finish it, though, just watch him.]

[This is going to be an ongoing pattern for them, isn't it?]

Since this morning, when the doctors announced they were researching it. [He looks up at her then, just tired.] I went down there as soon as they said it was possible.

[Mostly because they also said it would help out other people but --]

Don't worry. I'm feeling fine -- don't let me interrupt anything you've planned.

[ It is definitely going to be a pattern. They need an adult.

Except they're the adults. Especially looking at some of the other residents.

But Allura frowns. She is glad to hear, at least, that this wasn't something he's been keeping to himself for a while, in no small part because she would want to be privy to it, but also because he doesn't need more things weighing him down. ]

Shiro, you misunderstand. You're my teammate--my friend. Your wellbeing is my priority.

[They need a more adult adult. Or someone with more of an adult attitude than either of them have. Some things, yes, he's kept from her. If only because he just doesn't see it as important. As anything they need to discuss. This isn't one of those things.]

I know. [Sort of. My friend sends a pang through his chest, regardless of whether or no he knows it's true.] I know.

But if this ended up keeping us from finding something important? I couldn't handle that.

[ The mission comes first, as always. Inherently, she agrees as well. That logic was most of the driving force behind her decision to make sure Shiro escaped from that Galra ship. Shiro is the Black Paladin. Without him they could not have formed Voltron. In the grand scheme of things, her loss would be a set back, but not dismantle the entire operation. She trusted Shiro and Coran to lead the team.

This is two things: professional and personal. It's dangerous to toe that line, but after all they've been through--after how much better she feels about them since she arrived--it's not something she's willing to risk if she can help it. ]

I am not leaving without you.

[ There is no room for argument in her voice. ]

...Truthfully, I am not instrumental to this operation. What research I have been doing has been fruitless thus far. But even if it had been, the full responsibility of that is not on my shoulders, or yours. This place is as alien to me as ever. This community needs to come together. It's our shared experiences that will lead us to victory.

[ She pauses, then takes his glass from him to fill it up again with orange juice. ]

I may not be much help to the cause, but I will do what I can. And that includes you. Please do not forget that you are also something important.

[ Allura hands it back. ]

[There's that pang again. It doesn't hurt precisely. But it's something. It's a feeling. Looking her in the eye like he can't pull his attention away. It would be a lie to say he hasn't enjoyed being around her since her arrival, that they've settled into something besides just their usual roles in the Castle.]

[He'd... liked it. Honestly. But looking at her now, when she so firmly denies the possibility of separation, it's impossible not to remember that moment. The thing they'd never spoken of.]

[her face as the doors slide shut - accepting and calm and remote and] I'm -- [He shakes his head, breaking eye contact for a moment.] The feeling is mutual.

[I'm not losing you a second time.]

Maybe that's what we need. A perspective that isn't human. Maybe we need someone who questions everything here like you can. It's -- there are parts of this place that are a little too normal. Like the swan boats.

[As bizarre as everything was, there was that thread of normalcy through it all. That feeling of being back on Earth. Maybe someone who isn't native to this planet could spot the changes better -- or at least question them.]

[She's handing him back the glass. But his hand curls around hers. Just for a moment.]

So are you.

[ She listens quietly as he offers a new perspective on the situation. It is a little relieving to hear it, actually--Allura had been a little concerned that some of her questions would become tiresome at some point, even if not by Shiro in particular. Alteans were naturals at blending in with the locals and Allura herself had been groomed and trained to ease into all sorts of cultures with a good face as a representation for their civilization, but a diplomatic meeting is an entirely different experience than spending weeks upon weeks on another planet as a civilian. Sometimes she felt unprepared.

But Shiro helped more than he knew, just like he is now.

The mention of the swan boats get a small huff out of her, softening some of the seriousness in her own expression. She shakes her head, shifting her gaze downward. That was another topic they had yet to discuss and she deftly evades it again. ]

Perhaps. I do hope that you're right about that. A non-human perspective is my default setting.

[ The touch of his hand brings her pause as she shifts her gaze back up to his face and holds it for a moment. Whatever she thinks she sees, she suddenly comes out of it. ]

--You should be resting as you rehydrate, shouldn't you? Take a seat on the couch. I can make you a sandwich.

[ That is something that she can do without much trouble, at least. ]

[They're lucky the majority of the people like them -- dreamers, wanderers, whichever they want to call themselves -- seem to be so open to alternative worlds already. Who knows how well this would have gone over, if they only had the townspeople to deal with. Both of them stand out fairly starkly when compared, after all.]

[He means it, though, that maybe they need an outsider's perspective. Maybe it would help them all start questioning this place more easily, more readily. Make it more difficult to fall into too-familiar patterns.]

I think it could help. I really do -- we need to be more careful, more alert. Someone who's never even seen Earth could do that. [His expression softens a bit, bordering on a smile. Some part of him is grateful for her side-stepping the issue, too.]

[Since he doesn't know what to make of it, even now.]

It's all right. It really wasn't that much. [His voice quieter, by a degree. He squeezes her hand, before letting it slip away.] But thank you.

[ Sometimes she is in awe of how someone who has been through so much, seen so much bad in the in the universe can still come out as thoughtful and kind as he is. Even if she feels it's a little placating, she knows his suggestion is honest and she takes it to heart. ]

Then I'll make it a habit to comment on everything I find strange.

[ It's a joke.

She does that a lot already.

He turns down her offer and Allura ~~pouts~~ frowns. Okay, maybe he should be a little more selfish and Allura also wants to feel like she's helping somehow. ]

Well...

[ She snatches the cookie bag. ]

Then why don't you take a seat with us at the table? We could use an extra pair of eyes.

[ And she walks right on over, pulling out a cookie and taking a bite. ]

Or else I may just finish these all by myself.

[Maybe if he hadn't gotten into the hands of the others so fast, things would have been different. Maybe if they hadn't been there to bail him out, keep him grounded, he would have been angrier with the world. But there they were, the four of them, then Allura and Coran -- people who needed him.]

[Then... it was easy.]

Good habit to keep up.

[And maybe he doesn't even realize he's being placating. At least until she frowns and he wonders if he's done something wrong --]

Hey! [Allura those were Oreos do you know how long it's been since Oreos were a thing? But it works. He follows along like she's pulling him on a cookie-shaped leash.] You can't finish all of them!

[Here he comes to drop down at the table with her, mildly alarmed.]

[ Allura has no concept of the significance of Oreos other than the fact that they are tasty. The frosting is her favorite part, though, and she is tempted to just eat that and give the rest fo the mice. But they have plenty of treats as it is.

She's satisfied with the results, though. Once they're both seated she makes a sort of dramatic shrug and then offers him the bag. ]

You did say it wasn't much blood.

[ As long as he's eating, though. Allura will indulge in one cookie by twisting the top off and offering it to the mice, who all immediately scurry over to and up on the table. ]

Can you tell me more about the hospital? If you don't mind.

[ She'd like to get an idea of what to expect in regards to Shiro's condition. Her clippings can wait a few more minutes. ]

[You know what, as soon as he sits back down, he's going to reach for the bag again. Come on, let him have them -- but she solves the issue by holding the bag out for him. Thank goodness for small favors. The tired twenty-something buried deep down inside him is eternally grateful for these cookies.]

[He nods, though, to her statement.] Just enough for a sample.

[Which wasn't nearly as bad as he expected it to be, but old phobias tend to blow up in your head.]

It was all normal until we hit the third floor. We even had to break into the floor itself -- it was all sealed up. And once we did... [He trails off, trying to find the best words to describe it.] It was like the whole place had been taken over by something.

These vines were everywhere. The air was full of what looked like spores... and it was crawling with things that looked like they were supposed to be nurses.

[ Far be it for Allura to deny him his much needed edible reprieve. She just wants to make sure that he takes care of himself, something she's come to realize goes far beyond being busy with space missions. His focus is so outward on the needs of others that there needs to be something to remind him to stop and take a moment for himself. Finding that balance without stepping over her own boundaries as someone who just cares for his well-being is where she worries about her own actions.

She just wants him to be safe and happy. He's earned that much.

For now she just listens, keeping her table manners in mind as she eats the bottom half of her cookie. ]

Vines and spores? Some sort of...invasive species taking root in a building?

[ Then again, they have seen some plant technology. ]

"Supposed to be" leads me to believe they were not.

[Funny, he'd say the same about her. That she deserved just as much, if not more. She's lost more than any of them, and just kept going. She'd lost more, been through more, than anyone ever should. If there were a way to give her some kind of reprieve from it all... he'd love to. Maybe that's why he's going his best to shoulder all the responsibility here.]

[To give her some breathing room. Even in a weird, dream-generated place like this.]

That... could be. I don't know much about plants at all, really. It could even be they're not really plants.

[But he couldn't tell her what they were.]

Their faces were covered. But if they sensed light or motion... they attacked you with anything sharp they could find.

[ It's almost as if it's something they should actually talk about. But dancing around these issues and trying to take on as much as possible is just how they work.

As for plants, she is learning, but she is hardly an expert. He could give her the details and she would have no idea what it was beyond "not a rose or carnation". ]

Is this where the doctors believe this contamination might have come from?

[ She just wants to be prepared for whatever results he gets back. ]

...That sounds terrifying. You were forced to explore in the darkness?

[There are... a lot of things they should probably talk about. But this place takes priority, he feels.]

That's what they make it sound like. I tried to be careful, but -- you know how it goes.

[She knows how he is. If someone else needed his helmet, he'd give it to them.]

Wasn't too bad. I always had a flashlight handy. [He waggles his metal fingers at her.] But, for the most part, yes. Whenever they showed up, we had to go dark.

[ It does.

The mission always comes first. ]

Mmm.

[ Allura can't really fault him for that. While Shiro may take some risks, they are rarely uncalculated.

She manages a small snort of amusement at his fingers, but covers it up as she clears her throat before taking another cookie. ]

I'm glad you made it out, clearly. That does make one wonder what sort of nightmare manifests itself in such a way... That is what these are, aren't they? Nightmares we are forced to experience?

That... could be what they are, there's no doubt about that.

[A few other people have thought the same thing. Asked the same thing. It's not out of the realm of possibility, since this place is supposedly built on dreams or something like that.]

[One more cookie, but this one toyed with in his fingers.]

But whose nightmares are they?

[ Allura feels horribly unequipped to deal with this world, and not just because that it's Earth and a different culture and lifestyle than she's used to. The sort of lofty reality of dreams is far beyond her areas of expertise, so she's left with "what ifs" and musings that have little concrete to them. It bothers her a little.

So she gives a single-shouldered shrug, a motion uncommon to her general demeanor. Painfully casual, though she seems to be more so when they're in the apartment. ]

Sodder's? Or the locals, perhaps? If we are truly asleep then they may be as well. Considering that we are more cognizant of the changes around us, then it might be their dreams that we're experiencing.

You know... maybe.

[She might be onto something there. With the locals. He hasn't heard enough about this "Sodder" to make a call on whatever it is they've got to do with this place, specifically. But the locals are another story.]

[He idly twists the cookie in his fingers.]

It would explain why they're always unaffected by what happens. Why they just seem like they don't care. If they're dreaming, then why would they?

[ Allura nods, feeling a little emboldened now that he's tagged on to her line of thinking. But they usually fed off one another intellectually, or they had done so well before. ]

Yes, that's exactly what I asked myself. My experience here may be limited, but each time something has gone...off, it's been very apparent.

[ Well. Except the whole swan ride. Or rather, the part that had been off hadn't been what was expected until it was too late. And yet locals still piled on without a care. ]

It's very easy to accept all happenings as logical outcomes when you're dreaming, isn't it? A faceless figure can stand in place of a loved one or a friend without question.

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